Friday, October 30, 2009
Columbus Temple
Last Saturday, after the ward's youth temple trip was cancelled due to H1N1, the family decided to go to the Columbus, Ohio temple to do ordinances. The twins and I did baptisms while Mom and Dad did initiatories. It was a blustery day, but very nice to go to the temple.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
God Doesn’t Make a No-Good Nothing, So My Story is Gonna be Good
Just some thoughts...
I started writing as an escape--an escape from the hardships of reality. Sure, I wrote about bloody battles and jipped princesses and dark secrets, but they weren't my own. I could make fictional characters go through worse things than I was dealing with, and I would know the outcome. Whether they had a happy ending.
One main reason why I love writing so much is that I can understand my characters. I form them, I create them, I give them personalities, I KNOW them. I know how they'll react to a certain situation, if their intentions are true and good, what kind of chicks they dig.
Reality is messy. Reality is confusing. Reality has no 'back' button. You make a decision, you're stuck with the consequences. You can't go back and erase your mistakes, rewrite your past.
Reality is unpredictable. Who knows what tomorrow brings? We don't know the plot to our stories. We don't know how a situation will turn out, who will be our friends or our enemies in the end, who will fight for us or simply walk away.
When I write, I know what one character will say and how another character will react. And it always turns out how I planned it. The story will have a happy ending if I chose to give it one.
As a writer, I believe I spend too much time fantasizing. Because I'm used to getting what I want in a book, because I can control my characters and tell them what to do and know what will happen, I'm frustrated by how I have no control in reality. In my novels, I can make someone appear at an opportune time. I can live my romantic fantasies through my characters, I can travel the world, I can create things out of thin air and speak foreign languages. I can ride unicorns and flirt with handsome, immortal knights in shining armor. When I kill off a romantic interest, I can know that the heroine will recover and everything will work out perfectly.
However, in reality, we are the heroes and heroines of our own stories, our lives. But we're not the author. When we're faced with trials, we don't know how things will turn out. We don't KNOW that we'll recover. Sometimes the world is as black as death and we can't even begin to imagine a light at the end of our tunnel. Who knows there will even be a light? What if it's just the headlights to the train?
In reality, I can't control those around me. I can't make someone appear, POOF, at my door when I need them. I don't know how people are going to react to what I say or do; I can guess, but I can't KNOW. I can write my own novels and play God to those characters, those people who live and breathe only in my imagination, but outside of my novels, I'm a pawn.
So who is the author to our stories? Who has all the plots points of our lives written down? Who knows what's around the next corner, who knows who will come into our lives, who will rescue us from the fiery clutches of the dragon that is life, who knows how our story will end.
Our Author is God. God has a plan for us; He knows what we need and what will help us grow and reach our full potential. Each of our stories is different, unique to us, and he's written them all down. And just how I cry when my characters are in pain, how I laugh when they're happy, God cries when we have struggles, He laughs along with us. And though I may not always agree with what God writes into my life, though there are things I'd alter and other things I'd add, my life is in God's hands.
I may not understand everything--it helps me relate to my characters. They must get so frustrated with me--and I may not know what lies ahead, but I have faith that if I do what God wants me to do, my story will have a happy ending. Complete with a Prince Charming.
I started writing as an escape--an escape from the hardships of reality. Sure, I wrote about bloody battles and jipped princesses and dark secrets, but they weren't my own. I could make fictional characters go through worse things than I was dealing with, and I would know the outcome. Whether they had a happy ending.
One main reason why I love writing so much is that I can understand my characters. I form them, I create them, I give them personalities, I KNOW them. I know how they'll react to a certain situation, if their intentions are true and good, what kind of chicks they dig.
Reality is messy. Reality is confusing. Reality has no 'back' button. You make a decision, you're stuck with the consequences. You can't go back and erase your mistakes, rewrite your past.
Reality is unpredictable. Who knows what tomorrow brings? We don't know the plot to our stories. We don't know how a situation will turn out, who will be our friends or our enemies in the end, who will fight for us or simply walk away.
When I write, I know what one character will say and how another character will react. And it always turns out how I planned it. The story will have a happy ending if I chose to give it one.
As a writer, I believe I spend too much time fantasizing. Because I'm used to getting what I want in a book, because I can control my characters and tell them what to do and know what will happen, I'm frustrated by how I have no control in reality. In my novels, I can make someone appear at an opportune time. I can live my romantic fantasies through my characters, I can travel the world, I can create things out of thin air and speak foreign languages. I can ride unicorns and flirt with handsome, immortal knights in shining armor. When I kill off a romantic interest, I can know that the heroine will recover and everything will work out perfectly.
However, in reality, we are the heroes and heroines of our own stories, our lives. But we're not the author. When we're faced with trials, we don't know how things will turn out. We don't KNOW that we'll recover. Sometimes the world is as black as death and we can't even begin to imagine a light at the end of our tunnel. Who knows there will even be a light? What if it's just the headlights to the train?
In reality, I can't control those around me. I can't make someone appear, POOF, at my door when I need them. I don't know how people are going to react to what I say or do; I can guess, but I can't KNOW. I can write my own novels and play God to those characters, those people who live and breathe only in my imagination, but outside of my novels, I'm a pawn.
So who is the author to our stories? Who has all the plots points of our lives written down? Who knows what's around the next corner, who knows who will come into our lives, who will rescue us from the fiery clutches of the dragon that is life, who knows how our story will end.
Our Author is God. God has a plan for us; He knows what we need and what will help us grow and reach our full potential. Each of our stories is different, unique to us, and he's written them all down. And just how I cry when my characters are in pain, how I laugh when they're happy, God cries when we have struggles, He laughs along with us. And though I may not always agree with what God writes into my life, though there are things I'd alter and other things I'd add, my life is in God's hands.
I may not understand everything--it helps me relate to my characters. They must get so frustrated with me--and I may not know what lies ahead, but I have faith that if I do what God wants me to do, my story will have a happy ending. Complete with a Prince Charming.
Friday, October 9, 2009
My First Job
Lately, I've been on a search for a job. I've filled out and turned in countless applications, and in the last week I've gone to two job interviews. One was for Journey's Kids, a shoe store, and it was a group interview and everyone else had a better resume and stronger answers (and I felt overdressed because everyone else were skaters) than I did, and it was purely awkward. The other was at Soho, a hair supply kiosk at the mall. They sell "fake hair" clips, sparkly hair clips and headbands and mirrors and etc. This was a one-on-one interview and the woman was very nice and I went home feeling pretty good about it. That was two days ago; today, I received a call from the Soho woman, Lindsay, and I got the job! =D I start on Monday.
The only requirements of the job are that I have to wear the products and look good. Which I can do ;) JUST KIDDING! Which means Lindsay, with whom I will always be working, will do my hair every day I work. Chyess!
I will be approaching customers and selling (hopefully) products. I will go through a three-week training process where I will memorize the products and the numbers to the colors of the hair extentions and how to best approach customers and be the best sales person I can. After the training process, my pay will bump up from $6.25 an hour to $7.25 an hour plus a percentage of my commissions, and if I sell enough products, I'll get a bonus on my percentages.
For the three weeks of training process, I will work three days a week, three hours a day. After the training process, my hours may increase. I love the hours, honestly, because it will allow me to still have time to do other things during the week.
I am very excited for this job! It sounds so much fun. I hope it goes well. =)
The only requirements of the job are that I have to wear the products and look good. Which I can do ;) JUST KIDDING! Which means Lindsay, with whom I will always be working, will do my hair every day I work. Chyess!
I will be approaching customers and selling (hopefully) products. I will go through a three-week training process where I will memorize the products and the numbers to the colors of the hair extentions and how to best approach customers and be the best sales person I can. After the training process, my pay will bump up from $6.25 an hour to $7.25 an hour plus a percentage of my commissions, and if I sell enough products, I'll get a bonus on my percentages.
For the three weeks of training process, I will work three days a week, three hours a day. After the training process, my hours may increase. I love the hours, honestly, because it will allow me to still have time to do other things during the week.
I am very excited for this job! It sounds so much fun. I hope it goes well. =)
Friday, October 2, 2009
Dinner at Cheddars
Last Saturday, the 26th, I was invited to dinner with Ashtin and his family: his brother, Adam, his dad, Steve, and his step-mom Mary Jo. We ate at Cheddars, a restaurant here in Fort Wayne. I had a Hawaiian Chicken Sandwich--very yummy!
It seemed very official to me, meeting his DAD for the first time. But they were all sweethearts and I immediately felt comfortable with them. I love this family!
It seemed very official to me, meeting his DAD for the first time. But they were all sweethearts and I immediately felt comfortable with them. I love this family!
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